Wednesday, March 3, 2010

March 3rd

That is an eventful day in my life.

Actually two separate March 3rds. On one March 3rd many, many years ago I was married for the first time. The other eventful March 3rd was just 10 years ago. That's when I was involved in a traffic accident that changed my life almost as much as that marriage.

The failure of the marriage was entirely my fault. My using along with the fact that I was depressed and also kind of depressing took it's toll on that relationship. The trust of my wife and the respect of my children were forever lost.

My children want nothing at all to do with me. That pains me, but who can blame them for those feelings.

My ex-wife stays in contact with me to some degree. She will lend me a few bucks or help me get groceries on occasion. A lot of things run through my head as to what her motivation is for helping me. I might be wrong, and have been many times but pity seems to work from my point of view.

Anyway, the accident is causing some of the problems that make my trips to the library to be infrequent as of late. Walking is hard when the snow is accumulating. It's also painful to get around when the barometer is bouncing from one extreme to the other. That's the way the weather has been around here for the past few days.

When climatic conditions are stable, so is my pain. While it hasn't disappeared, the discomfort is manageable.

The pain I'm experiencing is from peripheral neuropathy. There are few medications that have any effect on that type of pain. Opiates are useless. Some anti-seizure drugs have a slight impact. Certain anti-depressants take a bit of the edge off of the burn. There is nothning though that takes all the hurt away.

Let's keep our fingers crossed for a slowdown in the changeable weather in this part of the world. That expression, "If you don't like the weather, wait 5 minutes," is not one of my favorites.

OK! Let's we'll see what happens between now and the next March 3rd.

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