Wednesday, October 23, 2013

I have a dream.

"I’m homeless, and I’m an alcoholic. But I have a dream."

"What's that?"

"I want to go fishing."
Stumbled onto this pic on Tumblr. The dialog has been copy/pasted from the site as well.

Needless to say, this kicked me right in the gut. While not homeless and not alcoholic, some things have been put out of reach. Simple things that in the past have given much joy and pleasure. Many things that most of us don't give a second thought to doing, other than budgeting a bit of time.

Not to denigrate or stigmatize alcoholics, I'd rather be what I am and that...

It wanting for those types of things never hits at the right time though. The planning, even minimal thoughts as to what needs to be set aside are set aside by that beast that indeed lives inside of me. There are priorities, you know.  A friend once said that I know the consequences of my behavior and take it in stride.

While that may be true, there are times that the things that are missing hit me right in the face. The desire to enjoy a pastime so cherished in the past comes to haunt me in all sorts of different ways. To have the right equipment and licenses to enjoy this simple activity are bit beyond my reach at the moment.

To say that fishing is the only thing being set aside would be a lie. For some reason though it is one of the things that has been put away. Doing without is one thing that has been mastered. Self sacrifice for all the wrong reasons has been a way of life for awhile now

There are other appetites that need to be fed.

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